Most likely you thought you'd only come to America once so you chose New York as your stop because you've seen so much of it on the news, on TV, and in the movies. That's fine, it's not the typical American experience but it's your experience and it will be fun. If you're here for work, you should have no trouble meeting a man but if you're just here to tour it might take more effort.
New York in this case is New York City comprising the five boroughs of New York: Manhattan (very cool), Staten Island (very not cool), Brooklyn (up-and-coming), Queens (think of a man in a trash can) and The Bronx (don't even think of anyone from the Bronx being remotely datable).
New York Men:
If you meet a well-dressed and lovely man in New York the first thing you'll have to establish is whether or not he's gay. This is not a bad thing to ask in this day and age and will be taken as a matter of course in New York. It is NOT ever okay to ask in any other region of the country. One way to ask is to say, "Do you have a partner?" Usually the man will offer up that he's taken by a man or a woman. The word "partner" implies that you are inquiring whether he's gay or straight. Gay men in New York are very open about their sexual orientation and you won't have trouble with finding out who is gay or not.
New York is the world's meet-up space and every country in the world is present and accounted-for. Because of this, it is impossible to define a "New Yorker" so I am going to classify them as Natives and not Visitors. Visitors are those that are here on working visas and Natives are those that were raised in the five boroughs and "act like New Yorkers". Of the Natives there are two types, the Intellectuals and the Workers. Both are fun to talk to and date.
New York men are fast walkers and even faster talkers. You have to have a good command of the American-English language in order to even have a two minute conversation with a New Yorker. They are quick, demanding of good service, and also knows a lot about good conversation and fun. They are used to getting their way and to being treated well as well as treating others just as graciously. There is a lot of accommodation going on with so many people on one island that they know how to be courteous and move about gracefully. They are impressive men.
Where to Meet Him:
New Yorkers are terrible at meeting people socially when they don't know you. Partly this is true because although you're always around people, you'll never go up to anyone in particular and will just make eye-contact.
You'll have to meet him at a wine bar, a creperie, a gallery, or at a dance club...period. This is not the place to meet on the street for sure. There is so much mental illness walking around as "normal" people that New Yorkers are completely immune and will ignore any reaching out on your part to make contact. They pretty much assume that at any moment you will freak out on them with scissors and pee your pants. You must go to an atmosphere of gentleness, music, and intimacy otherwise you'll be ignored no matter how lovely you are. These men are used to seeing models everywhere they go and you're just another person in a huge crowd. Never think you're meeting a New Yorker in Times Square...you're meeting another tourist.
What He'll Look and Act Like:
The typical New York male is very well dressed, looks a bit European in his style but is more rugged and "manly". He is wearing one thing that is a conversation starter like cool glasses or an interesting t-shirt. He works hard for money and long hours but he also plays hard too and enjoys night life. New Yorkers are up all night, eat marvelous food, and comes from unique backgrounds like Jewish homes, gourmet Italian homes, and intellectual homes. He is almost always educated and very open minded. You won't find a New York man who doesn't have an opinion on something going on in the world, who doesn't know at least one story from the country you've come from, or who has never traveled. New Yorkers are the brainy boys from America.
New York men have great hair from the plethora of good barbers in his neighborhood, is well groomed, and has the best cologne, watches, and cell phones compared to anyone else in the country. He will be casual and cool. Nothing phases him like other men from America and he's not going to look twice at two men kissing, at a fight between two drug addicts, or even a person dying in the street. He's got somewhere to be and this would just slow him down.
He will be more sophisticated than any of his other American brothers but this has its downside; when he leaves his borough he's definitely not comfortable or making others comfortable within his own country. The rest of America does not like New Yorkers much to the New Yorker's surprise. They are too quick, too rushed, too prickly and demanding for the rest of America. Most Americans roll their eyes when they see New Yorkers coming and for good reason...they are about to get a headache from their demanding attitude. It always leaves the "accommodating" New Yorker quite oblivious to why no one likes them in say, Amish Country in Pennsylvania! They are irritating outside of Manhattan for sure.
What Kind of Girl He's Used To:
Manhattan boys are used to the most beautiful women in the world living in his building let alone the whole of the island. The girls he meets are sophisticated, independent, and have a great sense of style. All the ugliest dressers in Manhattan are either Visitors or Tourists and are invisible to the Manhattan boy. Models from all over the world come to Manhattan in hopes of working.
You have competition but also there is strength in numbers and there are so many single men in NYC who come and go that you'll meet someone who is unattached and interested.
Where Your Blind Spot Is:
What you don't know is the difference between a man of quality in Manhattan and a street rat. This is not easy to decipher right away since so many hip Manhattanites look like upgrades to the common street rat. Men of quality have interesting friends, scads of girls who are also his friend, and good jobs / are going to a great college in the city. Street rats are friends with only their roommates, have no girl friends apart from the drug addicts in his building, and the biggest red flag is if they live with a relative like their brother / divorced father / cousin. This is a street rat who never grew up. It doesn't matter that he's taking courses at the local community college...he's not datable.
The Big Date:
You'll probably start the date at a later hour like 9 or 10 pm. He will probably bring you to one of the most interesting restaurants you've ever been to in your life with the most amazing menu you've ever seen. He WILL want to impress you with his choice of wine, food, and venue so you'll need to be appreciative and nice about everything. Don't gush however with gratitude as you'll seem like a gold-digger...just play it cool and gentle. Manhattan men like someone who seems a bit more humble than what he's used to. After dinner you'll go to a bar with music or comedy or both. You'll both be walking around an incredible city for hours. Afterward you'll need to prepare yourself for whether you'll go up to his apartment or not. Manhattan boys are used to quick relationships just as fast as the cabs they came home in. You'll have to make a quick decision whether you're up for it or not. Don't be too dismayed by the size of his apartment. There are a million and a half people living in a few square kilometers in the center of the cultural universe of the world. His rent alone could sustain a family of four in the country for a year.
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